Thursday, November 08, 2007

Bottom of the News… Friday, November 2, 2007

Good morning! Well, my fellow Rotarians, let’s take a look at some of the weird and crazy things that are happening in our world…

Russia: President Vladimir Putin identified a new priority this summer and has rolled out a program to dramatically increase Russian’s declining population. Putin has decided to create a national youth movement with the sole purpose to encourage young Russian couples to have more babies.

According to a July report in London's Daily Mail, one Russian province is promoting September 12th as a patriotic conception day; they are giving away new SUV’s, major vacations and cash incentives to couples whose babies are born on June 12, which is Russia's Constitution Day.

Putin held a two-week convention in July with over 10,000 people in attendance. The conference had many workshops and promoted contests and prizes to encourage people to build larger families. One conference attendee said… “As a homework assignment, we were encouraged to have lots of sex so we could have lots of babies! Now that’s homework I can enjoy!” Wow.

Kansas: Recently a police patrol car was parked outside a bar in Jerseyville, Kansas after last call. The officer noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off--it was a fine, dry summer night—he flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left. At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road.

The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights and promptly pulled the man over. He administered a breathalyzer test and to his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, I'll have to ask you to come with me down to the sheriff's office because this breathalyzer equipment must be broken." "I doubt it," said the truly proud non-drinker. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."

And as your Rotary Reporter, this is the bottom of the news for November 2, 2007.


No comments: